Hazardous Drugs and Happy New Year!
Four days a week, I take a drug called Truqap (Troo-kap👊). The medication arrives by mail, sealed in a large plastic bag to keep it dry and clean.
CAUTION
HAZARDOUS DRUG
OBSERVE SAFETY
PRECAUTIONS FOR
HANDLING AND
ADMINISTRATION
That’s what the bag says! The black letters are surrounded by yellow caution tape. Omgg.
I willfully and happily take the drug, hoping to keep my cancer numbers down. And yet, I take something that clearly warns of its toxic danger. Is my entire being hazardous? Is my body emanating toxicity? I know this isn’t true, but I can’t help but wonder.
Soon after receiving the scary bag, I pop one of the pills into my mouth. It feels crazy to swallow a pill that plainly states it’s dangerous. Isn’t it ironic to take a hazardous drug to combat my disease? You’d think that eating pomegranates, broccoli, or... exercising... or... anything else would be the answer. As you know, I’ve tried all of those things, but the cancer came back. This drug, according to my oncologist, is making my cancer numbers plummet.
And honestly, I feel much better on it. Since it’s not a chemotherapy drug, it’s not killing off all my good cells. And—my hair is coming back. 🫶 The lengths I’m going to encourage it to grow are ridiculous, but hair growth serums and pills are working! It’s getting fuller, and it’s so fun to see people’s reactions. It’s looking better and better!
I had a great holiday at Sugar Bowl. All the kids were home, and we had such a good time together. They all kick my ass skiing now. I remember when my parents could beat me down the hill—and when that shifted. I like to think I was 13 or so, but who knows? All I know is now—boom—they’re gone! I’m the one at the top of the Disney lift, and they’re already zipping into the express line down below.
All three of my kids are back East now. My goals for 2025 are to spend more time with them and Steve. We’re planning to visit in April. Spending time with friends is also high on my list. I want to make sure I’m present and grateful for each moment. I want to appreciate what I have and not long for what I don’t.
And right now, I have time! Can we get together? Can we connect? Can this be the year we finally take that walk or grab that coffee? I’m looking forward to laughing, maybe even crying a little, but more than anything, I’m excited to connect with you IRL.
Let’s make it happen!
Jessica
